Homsemails/word salad
Homsemail #1
Homsar cancels hremails and starts his own email show.
Cast (in order of appearance): Homestar Runner, Bubs, Homsar, Strong Bad, Strong Sad (Easter egg)
Places: The Field, Bubs' Concession Stand, Homsar Reservation, Basement of the Brothers Strong
Computer: Tanpiér 1272
Date: Wednesday, August 5, 2015
Page Title: Beginning of an "Era"
Transcript[edit | edit source]
{Homestar walks slowly in the field, looking quite sad. Cut to Homestar walking to Bubs' Concession Stand}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {crying} Oh, Bubs... my email show got cancelled.. just because {kneels down} Strong Bad whacked me with Marzipan's garden weasel in email three-thousand-something!
BUBS: Homestar, it wasn't cancelled because of that. It's because somebody was replacing you!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {looks at Bubs} What? Who the phargtl would do that?
{Homsar waddles by, carrying a Tanpiér 1272 by.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, no. No. {Runs off with Homsar}
{Cut to Homsar waddling in The Field and Homestar running after him. Homestar starts to float away.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Midget me, you CANNOT and YOU CANNOT be replacing my email show!
HOMSAR: AaAaAaA, this turnip is my tickling jam!
{Homestar goes off the screen. Homsar goes to his reservation. He puts the computer on a rock. The Tanpiér displays;}
Tanpiér 1272
Translation Edition
{two pixelated men cartwheel across the screen. The text goes away.}
HOMSAR: AaAaAh, this comrade's gonna teach you some pineapples! {types homsemail.exe, hits enter}
Dear Homsar
Whenever you say something like 'DaaAAAaaaAAhh, I was raised by a cuppa coffee' or 'I'm a song from the 60s', what the heck are you talking about?
Have fun ^^
Coach E <3
{words in brackets are the words that Homsar is typing. He reads the entire email properly.}
HOMSAR: {typing} DaAaAaAaA, hidy-hello, Ms. Coachey Pants! (I don't know what you're talking about.) Why is the apple a swimming pool? (Okay, maybe. But I do have another side of me that speaks normally.) Cheesburger, you're the lover of Sundays! (But I think I can't bring him back a second time.) Why, purple bow? (I could try.)
{Homsar waddles to the Homsartifacts. He grabs a cheesburger behind his back and whacks it with it. Suddenly, purple clouds come out out of the Homsarifacts. The clouds disappear}
HOMSAR: (deep voice) I've done it! I may do it a second time. Now I shall celebrate by giving a visit to my good follow Strong Bad!
{Homsar waddles off. Cut to the doorstep of the House of the Brothers Strong. Homsar waddles up to it and rings the doorbell. The door opens. Cut to an angle of the door. Strong Bad is there.}
STRONG BAD: Sorry, Homsar, but you're Homsar. Come back when you're, well, um... (scratches head) NOT Homsar.
HOMSAR: (same voice as last time) But wait, fair mortal! I know I wasn't liked much after I accessed the Homsartifacts, but I do not speak bad now!
STRONG BAD: Woah! You can actually talk again! Say, you wanna go inside and eat some Swiss Cake Rolls?
HOMSAR: It would be a pleasant idea.
{Strong Bad and Homsar go inside. Cut to them inside, sitting on the couch, watching TV. They both have a half-eaten Swiss Cale Roll in their "hands".}
TV: It's the King of Town's Very Own Quite Popular Cartoon Show!
STRONG BAD: (interrupting on "town's") Auuugh! Why hasn't this crap been cancelled yet?
HOMSAR: I would quite-
{A record scratch plays. Homsar speaks normally.}
HOMSAR: -play that danish south!
{Cut back to Homsar Reservation. Homsar falls from the sky. He waddles back to his computer.}
HOMSAR: That lighthouse sure was a nifty dipwad! (So yes, Coach E, the Homartifacts can make my speech normal, but doesn't last long.) AaAaAh, tune in next one for circle bolts!
Easter Eggs[edit | edit source]
- Click on "lighthouse" to see what happened to Homsar when he fell from the sky.
{Strong Bad is on the couch. Strong Sad walks in.}
STRONG SAD: (looks up) Why is there a crack in the ceiling?
STRONG BAD: Don't even ask.
STRONG SAD: Whatever. I'm gonna go listen to my sloshy record now.
{Strong Sad walks away.}
Fun Facts[edit | edit source]
Remarks[edit | edit source]
- Strong Bad hit Homestar with a garden weasel in hremail3184, four years ago.
Goofs[edit | edit source]
- Strong Bad's arm disconnects for three frames when he scratches his head.
Inside References[edit | edit source]
- Strong Bad hit Homestar with a garden weasel in hremail3184.
- "Who the phargtl" is a reference to Sbemail 169 Deleted Scene.