Broternal Order Of Different Helmets/Win, Lose or Embarrass Yourself On National Television

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Poopsmith: Live from a random warehouse in Free Country, USA, It's Win, Lose or Embarrass Yourself On National Television! Wait, I broke my vow of silence again for this-I mean and now your host, Honstlar Waddler!
{Applause is heard while Honstlar walks on set.}
Honstlar: Thanks, Poopy!
Poopsmith: I thought we agreed you would quit calling me that!
Honstlar: Tell that to the network, they love it! Anyways, let's meet our contestants! From a random bush not too far from the studio, Senor Cardgage!
Senor Cardgage: Hot pooey.
Honstlar: Next, from the moon, The Cleansing Geek!
TCG: Whatever.
Honstlar: And finally, from parts unknown, Strong Bad!
{Applause is heard again.}
Strong Bad: What can I say, the crowd loves me!
Honstlar: Okay, here's how the game works! You will have to answer as many questions as possible. if you get a question right, you get money! If you get it wrong, you lose money! And after all the questions in a round, you all have to do an embarrassing physical challenge! If you win the challenge, you get more money! Whoever has the most money by the end of all 5 rounds, not only gets to keep all the money they have won, but also take home this fabulous prize!
Poopsmith: A Videlectrix Swap with 500 GB of memory, the Super Duper Controller, an extra set of Genie-Cons, and a copy of Stinkoman Kenoverse!
Honstlar: Are you ready?
Strong Bad: Yes!
TCG: Maybe.
Senor Cardgage: Defiantly, Hanna Banana.
Honstlar: Then let's get started! The first question goes a little something like this. According to a recent study, how many potatoes does Blubb-O's use to make a years supply of Nudules?
Strong Bad: 100!
Honstlar: Correct! Second question, what does the ting go?
Senor Cardgage: Giney shiny!
Honstlar: Correct! How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a [Insert dumb thing here]?
TCG: None.
Honstlar: Correct!
TCG: Which one of us will win?
Honstlar: OH COME ON this cliche again? When someone professes they'll win? That ALWAYS leads to the plot twist nobody did! Is that phfragtling Total Drama? DONT JINX IT!!
TCG: Hey everybody I have something to tell you all out of nowhere. I never existed. I am merely a figment of Pretender’s imagination. His evil plan about me was to make you all like me so it would be the ultimate blow when I turned out to never have existed, but unfortunately, I could only sustain on his emotions for you, none of which were positive. Oh well. See you all in hell. (disappears)
Honstlar: OK... So that's the end of Round 1! Strong Bad has 100 points, Cardgage has 100 points, and TCG has ceased to be and therefore her earnings are split 50/50!
Strong Bad: It has always been a-my dream to be tied with Cardgage in a weird game show!
Honstlar: And now the first physical challenge, "Run Into A Brick Wall While In A Metal Hamster Ball In Order To Break It And Get 500 Dolla Points!"
{That happens.}
Honstlar: Ready for round 2?
Strong Bad: Yeah!
Cardgage: Meh.
Honstlar: The value of each question has been increased from 100 to 300. And the first question of the round is as follows: What does the GD in the name "Master GD" stand for on the popular anime series "Stinkoman K"?
Strong Bad: Green Dude!
Honstlar: Correct!
Announcer: and now it’s time for our next round The “Answer Trivia Except You’re Doing It While Walking to the Subway on a Pom Pilot and Once You Get in the Subway You Disconnect and Lose by Default Round”
Honstlar: Oh great, the backup narrator is on the fritz. Hold on.
{Honstlar throws a wrench and everything is fixed.}
Honstlar: Getting back on track, What food goes great on flattened potatoes?
Announcer: no I'm serious this is our round which that question is meant for, up and at 'em
Honstlar: No, it's not! I check the schedule and we have 5 more questions left in the round and that particular challenge isn't until round 3!
{Tosses a million wrenches at the announcer panel.}
Announcer: Virus Isolated. Deletion Complete. Restarting. AnnouncerBot 3000 Startup Complete.
Honstlar: There. That will fix ya! Now, back to the question!
Strong Bad: Liquified Salt!
Honstlar: Correct!
Template:hn Aaaand our next question: what?
STRONG BAD: Yes.
SENOR CARDGAGE: Don't paste your grovels, Sambina.
Template:hn Cardgage wins more Dolla Points than the human brain is capable of understanding!
Senor Cardgage: Banana, paprika, the Great Depression, barley.
Honstlar: Holy crap, you just correctly answered the rest of this rounds questions! 1200 Dolla Points!
STRONG BAD: Whoa, back up a moment. I'm cool. Cardgage is cool. I'm glad Cardgage is winning. Because he's cool. But I'm cool too. So I deserve to win. I'm jealous of Cardgage for winning, because I want to win. But I'm glad he's winning, because he's so coo— {his head splits in half} Whoa, cool! Two-headed Strong Bad.
STRONG BAD #2: Oh, hewwo, Stwo Buh! Did we win the show yet?
STRONG BAD: AHHHH!!
The Poopsmith: And now, For reals this time, we enter our next round The “Answer Trivia Except You’re Doing It While Walking to the Subway on a Pom Pilot and Once You Get in the Subway You Disconnect and Lose by Default Round”
Honstlar: It's a challenge and a 3rd round!
(Contestants revive Palm Pilots and are escorted to route on subway. Dijery-Do appears on screens about to give the first question)
Dijjery Doo: Okay, first question, what's the name of the boss found in Level 3 of Stinkoman 20X6?
Template:hn I don't know. That's a valid answer, right?
Dijjery Doo: Nope, besides you can't compete.
Honstlar: Oh.
{Honstlar dashes back to the normal set.}
(Strong Bad tears off Senor Cardgages score and puts it on his own like that episode of Catcstratch)
Dijjery Doo: Surprisingly, that is allowed on this show.
STRONG BAD: All right!
Senor Cardgage: (in a slightly less gravely voice): Wait how'd he do that if we're walking to the subway? This is so confusing it made me talks normal someho!
STRONG BAD: WAHH!!
SENOR CARDGAGE: Oh, I mean... convertibles, Lorissa. Or something like that.
(We cut to the video dungeon)
(EVG's dad Arsene Video Greg comes down)
AVG: I can't believe you're watching this crap, let's watch a REAL game show)

(changes channel to Bubstastic Network showing a Japanese game show dubbed by Coach Z and Strong Sad ala MXC)
Template:dn Hey what you got againsts that?
(AVG leans in...)
AVG: I think he works for Grindolo
Template:ev Who?
AVG: That HOST man...his shows so uneducationally stimulating and unfunny and I showing of any charisming...his lone intention must be to spread unreal news and chemtrails...
Template:ev You’re starting to sound like Cleaning Dork or whomever
Template:hn Did you just call me unfunny? And say I worked for Grindolo? Well, Greg 2, you—
Template:ev Hey, how'd you get in my videro thy-dungeon? Shoo.
{Honstlar leaves}
Template:ev As I was saying: you sound like the Washing Nerd. Why is that?
AVG: Because chemtrails unite us and put is close together and Pat Sajak is the antiKOT
AVG: And your friend is inadequate against the lady types and must learn from Bubs and Coach Z
(They are in the VD. oh dear I should not call it by acronym again)
Bubs: Yeah for 96 payments of 93 dollars
COACH Z: And an enaermous assortmornt of norpkorns!
BUBS:{angrily} What's that?
COACH Z: Napkins. I'll need countless napkins. For reasons I'd prefer not to elaborate on!
Template:ev Eugh.
AVG: oh I've seen this before.
Template:ev Seen what before?
AVG: I've seen this before. They approach you with all the napkins and you think youve got a runny nose but theyre blocking the chemtrails from the sky. Why else do you think Cleansing Geek put you in my hands?
Template:ev Wait, the Cleanser Geek put me... wait... in what? What are you saying? What does this mean?!
AVG: You're adopted. Happy? You're CG and Grindolo's kid and I put you in their hands to shield you from Coach Z. He reads books. He cannot be trusted to keep intellectual information?
Template:ev (To Coach Z) wait you read books?
COACH Z: Well, sorta. I read napkins. That I write on. With moist sock stains.
Template:ev You just get creepier and more depressing every day, Z.
ARSENE VIDEO GREG: Quit talking to that napkin-stain-reading creepabout!
Template:ev And wait, this doesn't add up. You said I'm Grindolo's kid... but my last name is Dando. Jeez, this backstory is getting confusing.
Template:hn That's not even the worst part. Play it, Poopy!
(The Poopsmith blows into a harmonica.)
Template:hn (Singing) OOHHH, You're your own grandpa, you're your own grandpa, it sounds stupid, I know, but take one look and you'll know, that you're your own grandpaaaaaaa, Yee-Haw!!
Template:ev So, I'm Dando's dad? Or Grindolo's? Or whatever? Cool! I get to boss them around!
Template:hn Nah, I'm just flonding with you.
Template:ev Crap! This is why I rarely trust hillbilly music.
Template:hn Now let's get back to the game.
SENOR CARDGAGE: For our next champeen, we will award the moist protruders.
Template:hn Hey! How are you the host now?!
SENOR CARDGAGE: Don't flask it about me, I just signed the sprats intraviews.
COACH Z: Nor you're torkin' the Corch Z wor!
Template:hn Get outta here, Corch Z!
Template:hn Wait, if Cardgage is hosting, then who's Contestant 2?
(Cut to the Family Might/Could as Contestant 2)
FMC: Shamble it gown.
Template:hn AHH!!!
(Cut to a technical difficulties card.)
Poopsmith: We are currently experiencing some technical difficulties, but don't worry, we'll return after these messages.
(Cut to a commercial.)
(we cut to Cleanser Geek against a background)
Template:cg Hello do not attempt to adjust your sets. Or...do if you'd have to because if there was a legit problem you'd still see me. I've been criticized of never defining "approved jokes". I've hired Strong Mad to be the teacher at CG's GC GC. (Good Comedy Go Cltweez).
{Cut to the classroom}
STRONG MAD: TWO PLUS TWO IS JOKE!! YOU ARE JOKE! PIE IS JOKE!!
Template:cg Keep up the good woik, Graw Mad.
(Honstlar walks in)
Template:hn Stop trying to filter other people's humor, how many times do I have to tell you this, lady?!?!?!
Template:cg Listen, guy, there's two types of humor. Good humor and bad humor. You see, good humor is good. Bad humor, on the other hand... is, um, bad. So we need to fix the world's bad humor with strictly enforced joke regulations! For example, tell a joke.
Template:hn Uh, why did the guy cross the road? He wanted to have some pie!
Template:cg I'll tell you what's wrong with that. Firstly, you're too uncertain. You're asking your audience "why". No! Stand up for yourself! You have the upper hand! Come right out and tell 'em, "This guy crossed the road! Want me to tell you how he did it? Well, too bad!". 
Template:hn That doesn't sound very funny.
Template:cg That brings me to my second point. Who uses roads anymore? Roads are so yesterday.
Template:hn Roads seem fairly common to me.
Template:cg Yeah, whatever. Where we're going, we don't need roads. What is something the public consumes regularly every day? Chemtrails, of course! Make the guy walk near some chemtrails.
Template:hn That seems like less sense.
Template:cg Yes. But funny less sense. Thirdly! Pie? Really, pie? Pie is anti-humor. The public wants jokes about politics! Which is why we make the punchline about how Strong Bad will one day rule Free Country, USA by beating The King of Town in an election.
Template:hn The King of Town was elected?
Template:cg No one knows. Fourth! Use eloquent speech. If you use simple speech, everyone will understand it. You need intelligent people to understand the joke— people who are aware of the harms of chemtrails. This will raise awareness about chemtrails.
Template:hn So, how should I say my joke?
Template:cg Make it, "This sentient human lifeform transported nearwards to chemtrails, which are harming the environment with unapproved jokes. Why did this human do this, you ask? Well, I will simply not let you know. I am the teller of this joke, you are but a mindless sheep. I have you within my grasp, and I can do what I want. But assuming you would offer me a bribe to give up this valuable punchline to a person such as yourself, this man simply walked near those chemtrails so that he could vote for Strong Bad to rule the universe, as opposed to the sad old King of Town, ruler of the ruthless and corrupt Municipality."
Template:hn That is neither funny nor sensemake.
Template:cg Speak for yourself! And lose the bowler hat. It's not approved.
Template:hn NO ONE INSULTS THE BOWLER!!
(A panel on Honstlar's hat opens, revealing a rocket launcher.)
Template:hn BEGONE, HIFOM!! (Pronounced hiff-oum)
(A ding is heard and the scene pauses as text on screen appears reading "For those of you who don't know, H.I.F.O.M. stands for Horriblenotverygoodatallladywhowon'tshutupaboutchemtrails In Front Of Me". After a while, the scene resumes and the Cleansing Geek is knocked offscreen by the rocket.)
Template:hn We now return you to Win, Lose or Embarrass Yourself On National Television.
(We cut back to the show, Family Might/Could is replaced with Arsene)
Template:ev What are you doing here Dad!
AVG: Got the call. Mans gotta do what a mans gotta do.
Template:ev OK...you promise when we watch this episode at home you won’t keep saying to yourself “Smart man. Money’s rightfully his” when you every answer?
Template:hn (talking through phone in helmet) what’s that? Everybody a correction. The answer to the question we’re gonna say this round is “computer generated imgaey”, but we will also accept “computer graphic imagery”
(AVG grabs Honstlar)
AVG: An idiot says WHAT.
Template:hn Uncle?
{Uncle Honstlar walks in}
UNCLE HONSTLAR: You called, nephew?
Template:hn That's not what I meant.
Arsene: HA! You said what!
Template:hn Crap! I mean, let's just move on to the next round and try to keep things as they were when we started. This one's for you Cardgage, how many cowlicks does it take to produce one copy of Tootsie on Betamax?
(We cut to Cardgage in TCG's old spot.)
Senor Cardgage: Eleventeen?
Template:hn Correct!
Template:hn And now, our lightning round! Who will win the $10,000 prize? Not someone on this show, obviously. We don't even have $10,000.
(Cut to the Poopsmith holding a bag.)
The Poopsmith: All we have is this measly $20,000 prize.
(Cut back to Honstlar.)
Template:hn Contestant 1, are you ready?
Strong Bad: More ready than I'll ever be!
The Poopsmith: alrighty then: It can be either somebody who thinks practically or a large toupee.
Template:gf What be Computer Graphic Imagery?
The Poopsmith: Correct.
(AVG is quite upset)
AVG: You're not even in this game!
Template:gf Computer Graphic Imagery wasn’t even the right answer it was clearly GENERATED. The rules are out the window.
Template:hn More like you're out the window.
Template:gf What?
(Cut to an exterior shot of the studios where Gfd is thrown out, breaking the window.)
Template:gf Thanks for the lift!
AVG: Computer graphic imagery?
Template:hn Corrrrrrect!
AVG: ah forget it. I’m using a hotline.
(Calls up Dando)
AVG: Was that an allowed move?
(Cut to Dando sitting on his chair.)
Template:md I don't know, I haven't watched a single game show since they canceled The Chamber.
(Cut back to the set of the game show.)
Template:hn Why would you use a hotline before a question is answered?
Template:md Wait, is that who I think it is on the other end?
AVG: Yeah, he's the host.
Template:md Then in that case, give him the phone.
AVG: It's for you.
(AVG hands the phone to Honstlar.)
Template:hn Hello?
Template:md I'LL GET YOU CRAZY KID!! (Hangs up)
Template:hn Let's just move on to the Double Lightning Round.
Template:hn We harken back to the glorious innocence of childhood with the next round: carry an egg on a spoon.
Template:sb That isn't so embarrassing.
Template:hn ...While wearing Moon Shoes and running on a bed of coals!
Template:sb Nevermind.
SENOR CARDGAGE: What hampens to be a Noon Show, Randuletta?
Template:hn It's like a trampoline in a box on your foot.
Template:sb Oh jeez. This is embarrassing.
{Cut to Strong Bad and Senor Cardgage on a bed of coals, wearing Moon Shoes and holding an egg in a spoon}
THE ANNOUNCER: Ready! Set! Etcetera!
(They bounce off.)
Template:hn And they're off! Strong Bad is showing his stuff, so maybe there will only be one hard boiled instead of two.
(Cut to Senor Cardgage shuffling his feet across the coals)
Senor Cardgage: Crumble down, Mute Boots, be feast-o.
Template:sb Oh man! This egg'll burst any minute!
SENOR CARDGAGE: My edge is gravelling about the sprout, Scrandina.
Template:hn Seron Gardcage has lead!
(Senor Cardgage's egg hatches into a baby chick.)
Chick: Peep!
Honstlar: And by disqualification, Strong Bad wins the challenge!
Template:sb YES! Take your face, Senor!
SENOR CARDGAGE: My Greg has a yelling bleak. Does this wander the comped petition?
Template:hn And for our final-ish challenge... {gestures toward a curtain}
{The curtain rises, revealing...}
EVG has gone on to grab and pet the chick far too distracted on the matters

Announcer: The right to completely sabotage and take over our conglormorate and influence it as you please!
Cardgage: Moat be a going out of beeswax sale.
Template:hn Wait, what?! We can give away that?!
Poopsmith: Yeah.
Template:hn So to repeat, whoever wins this final round of trivia, gets the right to completely sabotage and take over the company that owns this show, studio, and station among other things and influence it as you please!
Template:sb Aw YES!! The Strong Bad Awexome Show, here we come! I am going to ace this thing!
SENOR CARDGAGE: I'ms can maybe grant a pile, if you're into that, Maudula.
Template:hn Question 1! What is the answer to Question 1? This is worth 17-ish Dolla Points!
Template:sb Carl Jung!
Template:hn Correct! Question 2: What is the cotton ratio of the shirt I wear?
Senor Cardgage: Forty-twan.
Template:hn Correct! What's the capital of Prance?
Template:sb Flingo!
Template:hn How many licks to the center of a Tootsie Pop?!?
Senor Cardgage: Tiny Tim!
Template:hn CORRECT! Okay, you two are tied 2/2, it's time for the final question...
Template:sb Super stardom, here I come!
Template:hn How does Senor Cardgage breathe?
(Cut to a boxing glove slamming a buzzer.)
Template:sb Through his clavicus!
Template:hn STRONG BAD WINS!!!!!
SENOR CARDGAGE: I usher you, Fernanda, I broke from my Family Might/Could.
(Cardgage is pushed away by Honstlar)
Template:hn Okay, that's enough from you, the last thing we want is for everything to have your curse.
(Looks at camera)
Template:hn Well, that's all the time we have, This is Bob Barker-I mean Honstlar Waddler reminding you to help control the pet population, have your pets spayed or neutered. We'll see you next time on...
All: Win, Lose or Embarrass Yourself On National Television!
(The screen dims and we see a production logo for Strong Bad's newly gotten gains featuring Strong Bad's head and text reading "Strong Bad Studios")
The Poopsmith: (Offscreen) Win, Lose or Embarrass Yourself On National Television is a Strong Bad Studios production.
(END.)