Homestar Runner Strategy Guide/Transcript/Act V

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Endgame Apocolypse[edit | edit source]

{Homestar and co. reach Endgame Apocolypse}

HOMESTAR: So, this is... Homeschool's glowy powtal. Evewybody, let's get ready! We don't know what's at the end!

{Homestar and co. reach a structure with Homeschool in front of it}

HOMESTAR: Homeschool!!!

HOMESCHOOL: Hee hee hee... Homestar, you and your friends are too late! You've came to see your doom! Now, I'll gain.... THE ULTIMATE POWER!!!!!!!!

{Homeschool leaps on top of the structure and glows gold}

HOMESCHOOL: Agggh! Arrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!! Woraaaaagggggghhhhh!!!!!!!!

{The screen goes white. When it fades back in, Homeschool Omega is floating over the structure and the background is a golden sky}

HOMESCHOOL OMEGA: I am... Homeschool Omega. I AM Armeggadon! I will be it's new creator! Feel my eternal power!!! Drown in the vast emptiness of infinity!!

STRONG BAD: This is REALLY awful!! You're just some...incomplete weapon-enity!

MARZIPAN: This is really horrible! You'll devastate nature!

POM POM: {bubbling noises} (You're WAY past insane with power, Homeschool!)


STRONG SAD: You've gone mad, Homeschool! You'll destroy everything!

COACH X: This is really bad! Homeschool has lost his mind!

THE CHEAT: Meh! Mehana! Menananah! Mememeh! MEH! (He's gone insane!)

GUNHAVER: Oh man! I've seen tough bad guys before, but Homeschool, you're the worst!

HOMSAR: AaAaAaAaAaAaA! Big spamming that pizza fish! S.S. Ragnarok has gone into bay! Make way for the arsenic express! (You've gone over the edge, Homeschool! You'll devastate the world as we already know it! You've gotta be stopped!)

HOMESCHOOL OMEGA: Ha ha ha. Your comments are amusing. I'll humor you, and myself, just this once.

HOMESTAR: We gotta stop him before everything is destroyed! This is it, guys. BWING IT ON!!!!!!!!!!

{Homestar and co. battle Homeschool Omega}

HOMESCHOOL OMEGA: Give up! My power is eternal.

{Homeschool Omega is whittled down to 100,000 HP}

HOMESCHOOL OMEGA: Grrrrrrrrr......

{several flashes of light occour}

HOMESCHOOL OMEGA: Agggggghhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

{Homeschool Omega transforms slightly from his "Dark Form" to his "Light Form" and elemental pillars crash into the ground}

HOMESCHOOL OMEGA: From the creator... The world is freed. {the Gilded Sword appears in Homeschool Omega's hand}

STRONG BAD: WOAH! He changed form!

MARZIPAN: Is it really impossible to defeat him?

COACH X: Wait! I sense a powerful energy coming from him. Is it... his conciousness?

GUNHAVER: That's it! That's his weakness!

HOMESTAR: That's it! We may not be able to stop Homeschool himself, but we can stop his conciousness!

{Homeschool Omega is whittled down to 5000 HP}

HOMESCHOOL OMEGA: I'm through holding back. Let's start this battle for real now, shall we? Very well, then. See if you can dodge this!

{Homechool Omega is whittled down to 500 HP}

HOMESCHOOL OMEGA: It's useless to challenge me! I am stronger than all of you combined! Just give up!

{Homeschool Omega is whittled down to 50 HP}


{Homeschool Omega performs Paradise Lost}

{Homeschool Omega is defeated before Paradise Lost is finished}


{Explosions appear over Homeschool Omega's armor, and continue exploding, and then even bigger explosions appear, and then Homeschool Omega's armor explodes in one last supernova-like exploison.}

HOMESTAR: You fowgot one impowtant thing about battling, Homeschool! And that is... that toast doesn't equal five!

STRONG BAD: Oh, I am so sick of you being an idiot! Homestar, explain why Homeschool lost in a smart way!

HOMESTAR: Fine! {Homestar appears next to a chalkboard. He talks very fast as he makes incomprehendable calculations.} The negative energies of Homeschool, compined with my positive energy, created a neutral nexus, so neither of us could overpower the other through sheer power. Since that was our only point of difference, excluding looks, we were completely evenly matched. To avoid a long, boring fight scene, the folks over at the Fanstuff Wiki decided to draw out every point that could possibly affect the outcome and weighed the two competetors. It looked like Homeschool would win, until they discovered one thing that tipped the scales unbelievably: popularity. It turns out that the whole reason I won was because I'm stupid! Therefore, I shall end my speech now, before it causes a time paradox that undoes our very existance, risking the threaght that Homeschool would take over the universe! {The screen goes back to normal at Free Country. Everyone, including Homeschool (who has transformed back) is staring at him blankly. Homestar looks at them angrily.} I'M MORE POPULAR!

STRONG BAD: Ummmmmmm... No.

{Roll credits. After they are done, two pairs of eyes appear on the black screen, one red, and one green.}

RED EYES: So, does toast equal five?


RED EYES: Now we can control Armaggedon. And we will not be stopped!

GREEN EYES: Uh... how do I turn on the lights?

{"TO BE CONTINUED" appears on the screen. After a few seconds, "MAYBE" appears under. The player than returns to Homestar's House.}