Gfd's Scratch Stuff/lost

Fanmade Pixel Strong Bad Email

Strong Bad gets lost in... time, I guess?

Cast (in order of appearance): Homestar Runner, Strong Bad, The Cheat, Coach Z, Bubs (Easter egg), The Goblin, Old-Timey Strong Bad, Ready for Primetime, Eh! Steve!, Sherlock, Casio Head Strong Bad, Vector Strong Bad, Pom Pom, The Homestar Runner (storybook), Tiny-Handed Strong Bad, Dijjery Doo, The Fat Bee, The King of Town, Strong Mad, The Bug, Drive-Thru Whale, Marzipan, Homestar Runner/Homsar Hybrid, Blom Blom, Chom Pom, SRMX12, Coach E,, Humidibot, Futuristic Homestar Runner, Futuristic Pom Pom, The Troll (Easter egg)

Places: Computer Room, The Cheat's Computer Room, The Field, Spooky Woods, Old-Timey Field, Sweet Cuppin' Cakes Land, Vector Field, Storybook World, The King of Town's Castle, The Island, The Stone Bridge, Paper Background, Basement of the Brothers Strong, FBI Warning, The Classroom, Hremail Room, Club Technochocolate, Strong Badia, The Stick, The Office, Living Room of the Brothers Strong, Futuristic Field, Old-Timey Spooky Woods (Easter egg)

Computer: Lappier

Date: Saturday, December 22, 2018

Running Time: 10:07

Transcript
''{Open to a black screen. Homestar Runner slowly rises up from the bottom.}''

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hello, everyone. My name is Homestar Runner. I regret to inform you that your email show has been cancelled... in favor of the Homestar Runner Song and Dance Show. Let's begin. {turns around after a brief pause} Wait, that's not what I'm supposed to say? {turns back} Ahem. The following hilarious cartoon style is not by a cool bug. Pixel sbemails are made by Milton-Bradley Game Company... {turns around after another brief pause} You mean to tell me that's not what MB Game Company stands for? {turns back} All right, the point is, this is a recreation of MB's pixel styles. Which is a recreation of some Flash styles. Based on a fake book from the '90s. Whatever. Let's get into the cartoon. {goes down to the bottom of the screen}

{Fade in to the computer room}

STRONG BAD: {offscreen} Looks like I'm gonna have to jump! {jumps into the screen from the right side of the frame, wearing his Dangeresque glasses} Hey, The Cheat. I'm back from the Dangeresque 5 filming. {looks around} ...The Cheat? {looks to his right} The Cheat, I need you to steal me a sub sandwich. Hello?

{Strong Sad walks in from the left}

STRONG SAD: Um, he's not here, Strong Bad. I think he's animating again.

''{Cut to The Cheat on his computer. He is animating a scene with Strong Bad and Homestar in the Field with an orange sky.}''

POWERED BY THE CHEAT STRONG BAD: I will punch your face, you Homestar.

POWERED BY THE CHEAT HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh no! It's a Strong Bad!

{Powered by The Cheat The Cheat appears}

POWERED BY THE CHEAT STRONG BAD: Oh, look at The Cheat! Have a pizza, the The Cheat!

{Powered by The Cheat Coach Z peeks in from the left}

POWERED BY THE CHEAT COACH Z: Who wants to hear my new rap song?

''{Cut back to Strong Bad's computer room. Strong Bad's cool, cool glasses are now resting on the table.}''

STRONG BAD: Yeah, that sounds like him. I guess I can just check my email in the meantime. {jumps onto his stool}

{Cut to the Lappier}

STRONG BAD: {typing "]STRONGBAD_EMAIL.EXE"} The following email is not intended for those with low tolerance for awesome. Please consult a physicist before entering the email. {brings up the email}

HEY THERE, STRONG BAD, JUST CURIOUS, HAVE YOU EVER GOTTEN LOST BEFORE? ANY STORIES YOU COULD SHARE? FROM SOME PERSON IN PA

STRONG BAD: {typing} Me? Gotten lost?! Nope. No way, man. Never happened before.

STRONG SAD: {offscreen} Strong Bad...

''{Cut to a full view of the computer room. Strong Bad jumps off his stool.}''

STRONG BAD: {turns toward Strong Sad} Why are you still standing there?

STRONG SAD: I don't think that statement is entirely accurate, Strong Bad. Remember that time you got lost when&mdash;

STRONG BAD: Shut your facepile.

''{Cut back to the Lappier, now with a clear screen. Strong Bad sits down.}''

STRONG BAD: Okay, some person. Maybe I got lost once before. But it was all because of The Cheat. One day, I was taking my The Cheat for a walk... {pause} Um, shouldn't there be a wavy flashback or something happening bou' now?

{Wavy transition to the Field, where Strong Bad is walking The Cheat on a red leash}

STRONG BAD: Hey, The Cheat. You think Bubs noticed when we took his fundraiser candy bars?

THE CHEAT: Mehh-meh!

STRONG BAD: Yeah, I didn't think so either. Let's go home.

''{Cut to a black screen with the white text "5 MINUTES LATER..." above a picture of a clock. Fade in to Strong Bad and The Cheat in the Spooky Woods at night. The Cheat is no longer wearing his leash, and there is a pumpkin to the left of them.}''

STRONG BAD: Um... I don't think we were going the right way, The Cheat. {turns right and points} I'm not sure, but I think our house is... this way. Come on, The Cheat.

THE CHEAT: {shaking with a worried expression} Mmmeeeeehhh!

''{Fade out as they walk right. Fade in to a different area of the Spooky Woods, as they walk in from the left. The Goblin stands in front of them.}''

THE GOBLIN: {dances}

STRONG BAD: Oh look, it's the Goblin. {turns toward the Goblin} Hey, I thought you only hung out here on Halloween.

THE GOBLIN: {dances}

STRONG BAD: Sorry, I can't understand you. I never learned to speak organ music.

THE GOBLIN: {lowers eyelids; dances}

STRONG BAD: Well, we gots to get home now. Bye, The Goblin.

''{They walk offscreen. Cut to a road in the woods, as they walk onscreen. They stop.}''

STRONG BAD: Ah-ha! This road should take us home, right?

''{They continue walking. Cut to them arriving in the Old-Timey Field.}''

STRONG BAD: Apparently not. Well, now we're really lost.

{Old-Timey Strong Bad jumps in from the right}

OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: Bah! What are you doing here, you red-gloveded buffoon?

STRONG BAD: Oh, um, I was just taking my The Cheat here for a walk. Then we got lost.

THE CHEAT: Meh mehh meh mehhmeh.

OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: I don't belive you, you pointy-faced wrestlem'n! Or your yellow-steckled gerbil! You came here to steal from my pie factory, didn't you?

{Cut to a close up of Strong Bad with a blurry background}

STRONG BAD: What pie factory?

''{Cut to a zoomed out shot revealing a large factory behind them. Old-Timey Strong Bad turns toward Strong Bad and The Cheat, and The Cheat turns around to face the factory.}''

OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: Uncle Strong Bad's Goode-Time Old-Fashioned Piematorium!

{Cut back to a medium shot}

OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: Serving only the best pies in the Factory/Circus District since 1933!

THE CHEAT: {turns back around}

STRONG BAD: Uh, yeah, that's great and all, but me and my The Cheat here need to go. And even though stealing pies totally sounds like something I'd do, I didn't come here to do that.

OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: I am offended that you believed I would be tricked by your decievery! {turns toward the camera} Heretherefore, we shall duel!

STRONG BAD: Uhhh... {turns to The Cheat} C'mon, The Cheat, let's get outta here fast. {turns around twice before pointing toward the camera} Let's-a go this way.

THE CHEAT: Mehmeh mhzh!

STRONG BAD: Whaddaya mean we can't go that way?!

THE CHEAT: Meh.

STRONG BAD: Oh. We're not in 3D. Well, that's disappointing. Let's just go back the way we came.

{They dash off to the left}

STRONG BAD: Peow!

''{They run into Sweet Cuppin' Cakes Land. Strong Bad skids to a halt. Ready for Primetime is jumping, Sherlock is floating, Eh! Steve! is dancing, and Casio Head Strong Bad is tipping his keyboard head. Homestar can faintly be seen flying in the thyme machine in the background.}''

STRONG BAD: {lowers his head} Well, this is fantastic.

THE CHEAT: Mehzeh meh meh!

STRONG BAD: {turns around} You said it, The Cheat! We gotta get out of this crazy cartoon!

''{Fade out. Fade in to Strong Bad and The Cheat in the Vector Field, where Vector Strong Bad is floating from one side of the screen to the other.}''

STRONG BAD: Check it out! It's my giant vector head! It's been a while! What's been up, my main man?

{The Cheat turns around}

VECTOR STRONG BAD: WHAT'S UP MAN

STRONG BAD: Nothin' much. So... which way to Free Country, USA?

VECTOR STRONG BAD: I DUNNO

STRONG BAD: You mean... we'll have to stay here forever?

VECTOR STRONG BAD: YEAH, TOTALLY

STRONG BAD: Aw, man!

THE CHEAT: {turns around and closes his eyes in despair} Mehhh!

VECTOR STRONG BAD: JUST KIDDING ;)

{Strong Bad and The Cheat react in surprise}

VECTOR STRONG BAD: FOLLOW ME

{The three of them go right}

VECTOR STRONG BAD: TRY NOT TO A SPLODE

''{As they leave the frame, the screen begins to fade out. Cut to the Storybook World, where Strong Bad and The Cheat walk in. Various storybook characters walk and jump around. Pom Pom bounces. The Homestar Runner talks a bit, then does a flip, then turns around repeatedly while talking. Storybook The Cheat goes left and right, then turns around a few times, then jumps a few times. Then, for a few seconds, he jumps while turning around. Tiny-Handed Strong Bad walks in, looks around, then walks back out, before peeking back into the frame for a moment. Dijjery Doo walks in, then jumps twice. The text reads "Just about then, Strong Bad entered the Worldwide Million Dollars Race Awards Festival."}''

STRONG BAD: Hey, I remember this! This was after old me won the Worldwide Million Dollars Race Awards! Well, The Cheat, now that we're in the past... it's time to start doing what I call: messin' with history!

''{Cut to Strong Bad talking to Tiny-Handed Strong Bad. Pom Pom can be seen bouncing in the background, and Storybook The Cheat can be seen turning around a few times.}''

STRONG BAD: Yo, T.H.S.B. My name is Supreme Cool Strong Bad from the future. I'm gonna need you to... start talkin' in a cool Mexican accent from now on.

''{Tiny-Handed Strong Bad jumps three times, twice in midair. Cut to Strong Bad talking to The Homestar Runner. Tiny-Handed Strong Bad can be seen walking around in the background, and Dijjery Doo walks in and jumps twice.}''

STRONG BAD: I say there, Homestar, have you ever considered... Wait, what's that sound? {turns around}

{Cut to modern-day Homestar Runner smiling and riding the Fat Bee through the clouds}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: C'mon, you ol' bug! {kicks the bee twice} Fly like the sky! {slips off the bee}

''{Cut to Strong Bad and The Cheat. Homestar falls in front of them, and they jump back in surprise.}''

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, hey hey, juys juys! Guess what?

STRONG BAD: Ugh. What?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {lifts up one foot} I have three legs!

STRONG BAD: Yeah, whatever.

{Homestar puts his foot down}

STRONG BAD: How did you end up here anyways?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {looks around for a few seconds} I bo know. I just pressed some buttons on that box-a-machine, {pan right to reveal the thyme machine next to Homestar} and ended up here.

{Cut to a close-up of Strong Bad}

STRONG BAD: So, where exactly did you get that machine? {points to it}

{Cut back to a wide shot}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: A wrestlem'n gave it to me some times ago.

STRONG BAD: {lowers eyelids} Uh, Homestar, you realize who you're talking to, right?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {turns around, then turns back and jumps in surprise} Ooh! Ooh! Wrestlem'n! I knew we'd meet again! {takes his star off and shakes it} Will you sign my star?

{After a pause, Strong Bad steps in front of The Cheat and turns around to talk to him}

STRONG BAD: The Cheat! This is it! We can finally get out of here! {turns around} Hey, Homestar, could we borrow that useless box a moment?

{Homestar can be seen about to eat his star before Strong Bad turns around, and he hastily puts it back on}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: No way, man. My very good friend wrestlem'n gave 'em to me for like fifty chicken nuggets! I'm not letting anyone take it from me!

STRONG BAD: How's about a trade? {points at the machine} Your useless time box for... lessee, what do we got here? {takes an old-timey pie from hammerspace} One gray pie.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {takes the pie} Oh goodness! Everyone knows gray pies are my favorite types! I'll take it! {pause, then lifts the pie into the air} I'll take twelve!

''{Strong Bad steps forward to the machine. Homestar turns around to talk to him.}''

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Don't forget to return that thing when you're done with it!

STRONG BAD: I will totally, definitely do that. For real.

''{Strong Bad gets in. The Cheat jumps in upside down, then wiggles himself right-side up. The machine begins to take off.}''

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Bye, Rondleman! See you next year!

{The machine leaves the frame}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Man, what a cool guy.

''{Cut to the thyme machine travelling through brief images of other toons. White particles and circles fly through the air, and there are a whole bunch of cool time travelly effects. Cut to the sky. The thyme machine appears in a flash. After a moment, it begins to tip, then fall. Cut to the Field, where it lands. The Cheat turns around.}''

STRONG BAD: Well, that was a pain in the brain. I'm starting to feel a little... woozy. {shakes his head} Whoa! We're back in Free Country, USA! We're not lost anymore!

THE CHEAT: {turns around twice}

STRONG BAD: Come on, The Cheat. Let's go steal me a sub sandwich.

''{Cut to the same "5 MINUTES LATER..." screen as before. Fade in to Strong Bad walking The Cheat on a leash through the Field.}''

STRONG BAD: Man, that was one good sandwich. I think I figured out why we got lost in all those alternate universes... Homestar was messing with the time machine earlier. He must've tampered with the... quantum timesphere. But... how did the time machine work? The thing failed miserably the last time we used it.

THE CHEAT: Mzehmeh mehh.

STRONG BAD: Oh. You forgot to subvert the plasma radions. The Cheat, you're fired. And, um... grounded.

THE CHEAT: {stops walking} Mzeh mhehh.

STRONG BAD: Oh, right. Sorry, little guy. You're hired again. Now I gotta get back to checkin' up that email.

''{Cut to the Lappier. Strong Bad sits down.}''

STRONG BAD: {typing} So there you have it, some person's pa. I got lost, went on a cool interdimensional adventure, and left Homestar stranded in a boring field for 20 years.

STRONG SAD: {offscreen} Strong Bad...

''{Cut to a full view of the computer room. Strong Bad stands up.}''

STRONG SAD: You know none of that story is true.

STRONG BAD: Whaddaya mean? The whole thing is fact!

STRONG SAD: {reaches his arm out} No, it's not! {puts it down} I was just talking about the time you got lost in our basement... when you were fourteen.

STRONG BAD: {after a brief pause} Oh, Strong Sad, when will you learn that lying is wrong?

STRONG SAD: {reaches his arm out again} But I&mdash;

STRONG BAD: Get outta my house.

STRONG SAD: {turns around and starts walking to the left} This is my house too...

STRONG BAD: {gestures for Strong Sad to leave faster}

''{Cut back to the Lappier. The Papier comes down.}''

Easter Eggs

 * Pressing "T" at any point will cause the text appearing effect to change.
 * Default
 * The letters fade in
 * The letters start small and grow
 * The letters start large and shrink while fading in
 * The letters shake when they appear
 * The letters jump up briefly when they appear
 * The letters turn as they move to their position
 * The letters rise from the bottom of the screen
 * In the first screen of the Spooky Woods, click on the moon to see Bubs's fundraiser candy bars.
 * At the end, click "interdimensional" to see an old-timey scene.
 * {Cut to the Old-Timey Spooky Woods, with Old-Timey Strong Bad and an old-timey version of the Goblin, with a fancy haircut and bowtie}
 * OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: I say, The Troll, fancy meeting you in this lush woodland! I had thought you only came here on the date of All Hallow's Eve!
 * THE TROLL: {dances}
 * OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: Curses and drat! I can never understand accordion music! {turns around} Can anyone tell me what G# means?


 * At the end, click "Homestar" to see him.
 * {Cut to the Storybook World at night. Homestar stands in the middle of the field, smiling for several seconds. A shooting star flies past in the background.}
 * HOMESTAR RUNNER: This is the best VHS I have ever rented.


 * At the end, click "boring" to see Strong Bad discussing the email.
 * {Fade in to the basement. The Cheat is on the left side of the couch, while Strong Bad sits on the right.}
 * STRONG BAD: Man, that was such an original email! I went on an adventure through alternate universes... because Homestar was messing with an invention I owned... I met my old-timey and vector selves... travelled to the storybook world... That's totally never been done before!
 * THE CHEAT: {lowers his eyebrows}


 * At the end, click "years" to see what happened to the time machine.
 * {Cut to the thyme machine in the Field. The Cheat can be seen walking away from it. Modern-style Dijjery Doo slowly rises up out of the box.}
 * DIJJERY DOO: {looks back, then looks ahead} Hey you guys? Where are you going? What year is it?
 * {The Cheat runs back with an angry expression and taps the machine, causing it to fly away and disappear with Dijjery Doo still inside. Satisfied, The Cheat turns around and continues walking.}


 * There are numerous unused costumes hidden in the project.

Trivia

 * On December 26, four days after the email's release, the project was edited so that the "T" button altered the computer text as well. (Before, it only changed the speech text.)